Ever wondered how we can know so much about climate change, but be so rubbish at tackling it?

Try speaking at an event on the subject.

The scene: a conference suite in Bournemouth, during the last days of the Ming dynasty. The subject? What to do about global warming…

My precise position on the panel was ample evidence of the stark realities of climate change, as so often experienced by those of us in the, er, front line.

In other words, I was simultaneously chilled down the back of my neck by the breeze from the air conditioning while the side of my face was grilled by the hot air outlet from the projector – whose sole purpose was to display the sponsor’s logo throughout. (No power, no point…).

Meanwhile, my eyes were dazzled by the glare of a hundred halogen spots. It would, of course, have been the cheapest of cheap shots to make ironic capital out of that.

So I did.

No doubt the hotel chain in question has all manner of carefully positioned motion sensitive lighting controls, dimmer switches and associated gizmos. But if our default reaction to a wall full of switches and knobs is to whack everything on to the max and leave it there, then it’s all a bit power-pointless.